Month: May 2021

MIRAGE OF SAND

MIRAGE OF SAND

surroundings of embankments of red sand
I grasp it in my hand watching as every grain
runs through my fingers like molecules of liquid

worn by winds filled with sand and rock
alone I rock, back and forth, and I begin to cry
why? does nothing last? can I not pick up
and hold you one last time, but alas
like the sands in this desert, or in time
you just seem to slip right out of my arms.

in this desert I weep for you there is no real
way for me hold you again, so a mirage will do.

05/22/21 – Andy McRae

The Man Who Still Wakes

The Man Who Still Wakes

I find that I am at a crossroads.
A beast with two heads,
One rests while the other is in glow.
An impulsive lad with no brakes
A drunken man has no legs.
A conversion with pain
Takes your breath away.

Villainous desires,
Plague the fire
The burning of the sheets.
Erased from the banks
A toll has been taken upon me.
Now these scars are all that remains
Of a story once worth telling,
Now become my standard beat.

The water trickling down his cheek,
Enough to make the weak break.
Yet still he rises from the bed
To make another history,
To tell the world at his wake.

And the earth shall quake.

	- Andy McRae

This an old one. Either from college or High School, not sure which.

Beginnings of an End

Beginnings of an End

Sorrow at the days I’ve walked by
I find myself missing those of whom
Are slowly being erased from my memory
Just to prove to me, that the past is past
And I am past that last.

The pain I feel as I wash away their faces
Of those of whom I knew, soon to not,
Is bearable, but terrible, I cannot stand it
I want to shout, but nobody would hear
They are all down there in the drain
To busy being swept away by my rain.

5/16/21 – Andy McRae

I listened to the screams of the dead.

I listened to the screams of the dead.

Echoes bring about thoughts of my own mortality,
Thinking about how they once lived with a duality.
I think that is where the comparison ends,
For I am no musician, and she has already met her end.
This world is cruel to those who try to take,
A look behind the cracks in the wall.
I hear her sonic, vibrant vibrations
Calling me, telling me that there is more
Willing me to see the foundations.
The bedrock of my own mortality,
How I will navigate through my duality.

5/10/21 – Andy McRae

In 2018 a Jill Janus, the lead singer for the metal band Huntress committed suicide. It was hard to see another talented musician’s life end this way, but this one hit me extra hard. She was bipolar, like I. Although I was not having any issues like that it makes you feel like if it can happen to them, it could happen to me. It scared me. Fast forward a couple years, I was listening to Huntress for the first time in a while and it made me think of this and I wrote this poem.